Helping Parents Heal is all about the continuation of life and the continuing bonds model of grief therapy.  Grief therapy used to be about accepting the fact your loved one is “dead” and moving on without them.  If you’re a religious person, perhaps you’d believe you’ll see them one day, “in the sweet by and by”.  But, it’s goodbye for now, for the “rest of my life”.

Helping Parents Heal turns this on its head. Our kids are not dead. They are not gone. We will see them again one day.  In the meantime, we can maintain a relationship with them.  One of the most compelling pieces of evidence for this is mediumship.  A good medium reading can do more healing than years of traditional grief therapy.

I work with a number of mediums and over the last several years have grown more familiar with the process and how it can help people. Today I have arranged a demonstration from a certified medium, Kat Baillie.  Kat is going to attempt to do a demonstration of how mediumship works via video conferencing to about 50 people she has never met. Kat has never attempted this before (via technology). So, this is a bit of an experiment.

Kat and I go over the details and have a dry run so she can get familiar with the technology. I tell her I’ll run the meeting- tech-wise. All she has to focus on is spirit.  The meeting is going to be at 10 PM her time since she’s in London.  She has a paid reading set up with a client for 8 PM because, as she explains, this will open her up, warm her up for the demonstration.

The time for the meeting comes, I introduce Kat and she’s off. The first person she comes to can’t claim anything Kat is bringing out.  It’s “‘No… no… no…” This is one of the funny things about these gallery readings and I’ve seen it before.  I’d think the spirit would walk up and say “Hi, I’m Shayna and this is a message for my mother Tywana, the woman over there.”  That’s not the way it works.  The medium doesn’t know exactly who the spirit coming in is for at first. They’ll point to a section of the room. In this case, Kat picked someone one her computer screen. Kat doesn’t get rattled. Eventually the mother says “I think this is for someone else.”  Also, the information seems to come in kind of slow and first and the inaccuracies will be up front, until the medium  fine tunes into the particular spirit and things start to flow.  Kat shifts to someone who can claim everything Kat has said so far. Then the connection is clear. Right information. Wrong person.  Kat proceeds to give her an amazing reading. Then, she circles back around to the first mother whose son was very different in life.  And Kat gives her a spot on reading, including the fact he worked on motorcycles, what he looked like, the nature of his skin, and the fact he is still working on motorcycles in “heaven”.  What we are finding is when we ask “What do they do all day over there?” is they often are doing the same things. I watch as this mother’s face lights up with fond memories of her son.

Kat goes on to other mothers (and some fathers) giving amazing evidence not only of how their kids were in life, but current events that the kids know about now.  Kat identifies dogs (and cats) that are in spirit with the children, describing them. She talks about hobbies the kids had when they were here. She talks about there personalities.  An uncle of two young children, ages 3 and 1, know his sister is having trouble getting them to go to sleep and he’s helping with that.  A daughter knows her mother wears her earrings and keeps them in a box.  A son knows his mother is considering publishing something he wrote.  Getting what the kids did in life, what they died from, that stuff is impressive enough. But, the fact that the kids know what is going on our lives now and tell us to keep talking to them, keep remembering them, keep honoring them, is amazing.  In one reading, a son extends a bouquet of flowers as the reading is coming to a close.  A nice gesture. Kind of cliche, but it’s the only one Kat says this to.  Today, when I log onto Facebook I see this mother’s birthday is today. That’s why he offered the flowers.  It was a birthday present for his Mom. During the reading she had forgotten that today is her birthday.

I’m far from a medium. But, I’m very good at reading emotions on people. I watched the faces of these parents as they went from skeptical or maybe even cynical to believers that their kids were right there on the call with us. I watched as tears turned to smiles.  I heard laughter as jokes were exchanged (inside jokes).

After the demonstration was over, I had people sending messages to me thanking me for arranging the meeting. I could feel the energy when I was on the call.  One mother followed up with Kat and was on with Kat after the meeting. I don’t know how long, but I know it was 1 AM Kat’s time when the mother sent me a message saying that Kat was still talking to her.

I know in some religious circles, particularly Christian, an interpretation of the Bible says consulting with mediums is wrong. I’ve written about this before. But, as I say, the proof is in the pudding. And, as the Bible says, test the spirits by the Spirit.  I saw healing last night.  That cannot be wrong.  I’m happy to have played a small part in bringing this together.

Kat’s at


This morning as I’m walking, I find a penny in the road. It’s a new penny, but it’s been run over by a car, so it’s kind of scuffed up.  I pick the penny up and put it in my pocket.  I say to Shayna, “Thanks for the penny, but you know our sign is dimes.  So, let me find a dime later in the walk.”  Pennies are common. We’ve chosen dimes as our sign.  I finish my walk.  No dimes.

Later, I’m out doing some shopping for the Derby Party next week and as I take my credit card out to pay, I notice a strange shape outlined in my wallet. I have an outside pocket on my wallet where I keep my credit card and there is a window where I can put my finger on the card to slide it out. Just below the window is the outline of a coin.  I push the coin up to the window so I can free it, and it’s a dime.  I’ve never put a coin in my wallet.  In the years I’ve been carrying it, this is the first time I’ve found any coin in it.


The coin is in the lower part of the picture, just right of center.

During the HPH Conference, Suzanne Giesemann told a story about a confirmation she had with a parent.  During the reading she got an image of someone swallowing live goldfish. Having learned not to filter, she delivered the information to the mother “Did your son eat goldfish?”  The mother replied in the affirmative.  In fact, not only did her son eat goldfish, the mother kept him supplied.  This seemed strange to Suzanne, but she took it at face value and posted the story on Facebook. This kid’s mother was  buying him goldfish and this came through in a reading.  The comments came in “Ugh… the kid ate goldfish?”, etc.  until one person said “Is it possible she meant the crackers?”  The way mediumship works is the discarnate will put a word or picture in the medium’s head that the medium can relate to. Suzanne knew about people swallowing live goldfish, so that is the image she was shown. When Susanne Wilson was trying to get Shayna’s name, she got an old black and white Western because she and her grandfather used to watch them together. Neither she nor I could make sense of it. When I posted it on Facebook, someone said the movie was “Shane”. Since Shayna does not have a common name, this was the closest she could get to something Suzanne would understand as her name.

Back to the story, this morning, I am taking my 7 mile walk.  Just as I’m at about the furthest point out, about to make the turn for home, I look down on the ground and there is a goldfish (the cracker). Actually half a goldfish. I take a few more steps and there is a whole goldfish. I snap a picture of it. The route I take goes past the elementary school, so some kid probably got into their lunch on the way to school and dropped a cracker on the ground.    I head home and as I’m on the court adjacent to ours I look down and there, in the middle of the sidewalk, is another whole goldfish cracker.   Now this has gotten unusual. One goldfish.  No big deal. Two goldfish. A coincidence?  A synchronicity?  A sign?  My analytical brain kicks in.  Kids from my neighborhood don’t walk to the school even though it’s only about a mile away. So, the same kid probably didn’t drop the cracker by the side of the road on Minute Man Way and on the sidewalk on Topeka Court. Also, the cracker I found near the school was beyond the school from this point. If it was a kid walking to school, he wouldn’t have gone that far.


I post the pictures on Facebook. Funny story I say. For those of you who heard Suzanne’s talk, you’ll get the significance.  Then someone posts ” Brian, I don’t know about the presentation, but saw your post on my last break. Walking out of work I found this….”


Now, I am the first to admit I don’t understand this stuff.  Does Shayna go around materializing goldfish?  I don’t think so.  Do they influence us to be in the places where goldfish are?  I don’t know. I don’t know the woman who posted this picture. She’s in our HPH Online Group. She doesn’t know me and she wasn’t familiar with Suzanne’s presentation.

I call these events “Easter eggs”. They are little things hidden in this game we call life to remind us there’s a whole lot going on behind the scenes we don’t understand.

“‘Do not turn to mediums or seek out spiritists, for you will be defiled by them. I am the LORD your God.”- Leviticus 19:31

If you’ve talked to a fundamentalist Christian about mediumship you might have heard this verse.  Keep in mind Leviticus is the same group of books of the Bible (the Pentateuch) that tells you to stone your children for talking back, says eating shellfish is an abomination, and says that menstruating women are “unclean”.  How many of us live by the book of Leviticus? A show of hands, please.

A little background on me.  I was raised in the church since before I could walk or talk.  My grandfather was the pastor. I was baptized (total immersion), receive the Holy Ghost (that’s what we called it), and spoke in tongues at the age of 13.  I’ve read the Bible cover-to-cover. I’ve studied church history and Bible history. I once thought the Jesus Seminar was the work of the devil because they dared question every word of Jesus spoken in the synoptic gospels.  I had a website called “Counsel for the Defense” where I was an amateur Christian apologist.  So yeah.  Been there, done that.

First, let’s look at a biblical perspective on the consultation of mediums.  Practically speaking much of the “Old Testament” (Jews hate this term, BTW) was about the purity of Israel, keeping Israel separate as a nation, keeping Israel as a nation. These were laws given with a very specific purpose. “Do not be like the nations around you.”  Also, the books were written not by God, but by the priestly class. Have you ever noticed they told you not to consult with mediums, but it was OK for them to talk to the dead?  It was OK for them to interpret dreams.  King Saul consulted the Witch of Endor because his priests couldn’t get him satisfactory answers from beyond.  King Saul first consulted dreams, prophets, and the Urim and Thummin (basically like your pendulums used by spiritists today. All of these were methods of contact the beyond. How is a prophet any different from a medium other than in name?  Saul went to the Witch of Endor because he knew she could truly contact Samuel (not an evil spirit) and she did.  She made the connection.  Yes, Saul lost his battle and committed suicide but perhaps it was because of his hypocrisy. Notice the medium was fine.  The medium was not punished by God.

Then, we have Jesus. In one of His highest moments, the transfiguration, we have Jesus talking to two very dead people, Elijah and Moses.  Uh, that’s being a medium, folks.

Paul, says to test the spirits by the spirits. The mediums I’ve seen have delivered nothing but loving, comforting, healing messages.  No demons would ever deliver these types of messages.  Test the messages? What are they? Are they loving, healing, life affirming?

1 John 4 1 Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world.

1 Corinthians 12 7-11.  Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good. To one there is given through the Spirit a message of wisdom, to another a message of knowledge by means of the same Spirit, to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healing by that one Spirit, 10 to another miraculous powers, to another prophecy, to another distinguishing between spirits, to another speaking in different kinds of tongues, and to still another the interpretation of tongues. 11 All these are the work of one and the same Spirit, and he distributes them to each one, just as he determines.

Now, let’s look at it practically.

When we “die” we don’t become some evil entity. We don’t go to sleep.  We are the same person we were before our bodies ceased to function. If I can talk to my loved one while she’s here, why am I forbidden to talk to her after she is in spirit?   I’ve heard some Christians say it’s OK for them to talk to their loved one directly but they’d never consult a medium. Oh, I can talk to her, I just can’t go to a medium to talk to her? Give me one good reason besides what you believe the Bible tells you. We all have the ability to connect with spirit, but some of us have more ability than others.  You consult your preacher. You ask for intercessory prayer.  Why would it be wrong to ask someone who has more ability to be the conduit between you and your loved one you can no longer talk to physically?

The proof is in the pudding.  A good medium reading can be more healing than several years of traditional grief therapy. Knowing that your loved one is still right here, has forgiven you, loves you, still participates in your life gives you the strength to carry on until you see them again.  What thing that is so life affirming and so healing could possibly be “evil”?

I respect everyone’s right to believe whatever you want to believe. But, I would encourage you to base your belief on common sense, facts and your heart rather than a handful of verses plucked out of an ancient book. What does your heart say to you about mediumship? How is mediumship impacting people in the world?

We are spirit beings. We don’t cease to be spirit beings because we are encased in flesh. When a medium works for us, her spirit is connecting with our loved one’s spirit talking in a way we can no longer do with our tongues and ears.  Spirit connecting to spirit is never wrong.  Mediums do holy work, serve spirit, and serve humanity.  Some of my favorite people are mediums and I honor their gift.

Last week I wrote about Shayna’s graduation day. Since I don’t get to have a high school graduation day, I took the day that Suzanne Giesemann featured Shayna in her keynote as her graduation day.  I know that Shayna is still a big, big force in this world doing more than she could have while in the body. But, that doesn’t mean I don’t miss having her in the body.

Today is Lakota West’s academic awards ceremony.  It’s the day we present the scholarship set up in Shayna’s name to a deserving senior student.  This will be the third presentation.  I attended the first.  I skipped last year.  My niece, Shayna’s twin from another mother, is going to help present the award this year. So, it’s turned into a family affair.  Her mother, my mother, my father, and possibly my brother are all coming for the presentation.  For some reason, they assumed I’d be there.

Here’s the thing. While I accept that Shayna is doing great things, in all honesty and full disclosure, it’s still like a consolation prize.  Awards nights and parent teacher conferences were always like Christmas with the girls. I looked forward to them.  Hearing teachers brag about how smart, considerate, and compassionate our girls were made my day. Shayna’s first and only awards night in that gym, she got all kinds of honors including being named as #16 in her class of about 600.  Shayna was good friends with #15 and told her she was coming after her. Being in the gym the following year thinking about where Shayna would be, what she would be getting was something I really did not look forward to doing again. I’m happy for your kids. But, hey, I’d like my kid here too. So, you just go ahead and celebrate without me.

It’s 7:30 AM.  Between now and this evening I have to make a choice.  Do I go to the ceremony for the family or do I stay here for me?  I’d like to get to the point where there is no jealousy about other kids’ accomplishments but 1,035 days isn’t that point, for me, yet.

Dammit!  Yesterday we returned from our eight day trip to Phoenix/Scottsdale/Sedona.  As Soul II Soul is playing in the background repeating the lines “Back to Life…. back to reality”, I’m writing this post remembering the bliss of being with my soul family over the last eight days.  I so don’t want to be here right now.

Tywana and I arrived in Arizona on Wednesday even though the Helping Parents Heal conference didn’t officially kick off until Friday.  I was looking forward to some sun and heat. We got some sun.  Not much heat. Arizona was unseasonably cool.    We planned to stay two more days after the conference closed on Sunday. We were meeting up with friends we met physically just over 14 months ago, but we have been in constant contact with since.  It was our third meeting actually face-to-face. We were meeting with other friends we have known over the last few years but have never met physically.  Someone asked me over the weekend just how many ways I am involved with these people because I kept mentioning one way after another I’m engaged with them.  I volunteer with Helping Parents Heal as an affiliate leader of the online group with two of them and Tywana.  Those same two and I volunteer on the Soul Phone Foundation. Those same two and I volunteer on Greater Reality Living (we will be launching the website soon. The book just came out- I’m mentioned in the foreword). And, I am a moderator in a Facebook group of about 6,000 people.  They are members. Also, two of the people I was meeting at the conference I am in conversations with about two different business ventures. So, we have a lot to talk about.  Since we don’t often get to meet face-fo-face, I had three conversations planned with three different people to talk about how we could do some of these things.

As I was leaving Arizona yesterday, I realized that of the three conversations I had planned to have in Arizona, I had only had one. Two of them involved money making ventures. One of them was related to our volunteer work. Guess which one of the three I actually had.

It’s not that we didn’t have time to talk. I was in the hotel with these people the vast majority of the time I was in away. We didn’t have a car. We barely left the hotel.  We stayed up late at night until 1:30 or so in the morning on some occasions.  We were up early. We had breakfast, lunch, and dinner together. But, while business talk dominated the conference, the business talk was not what you might expect.

As we were Ubering around town, one of the drivers asked about what brought us to town.  How to describe a Helping Parents Heal conference to someone in 30 seconds?  It’s not your typical industry conference.  It’s not a Comic Con or a Trekkie kind of thing. It’s not a hobby conference like coins or a boat show.  What is it that brought us to this conference? And, what kept us up late at night talking, so engaged that we hated to part company and go to bed?

Then this morning, it came to me.  Our talk was shop talk. We did talk about our business.

Luke 2 46 And it came to pass, that after three days they found him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the doctors, both hearing them, and asking them questions.47 And all that heard him were astonished at his understanding and answers.48 And when they saw him, they were amazed: and his mother said unto him, Son, why hast thou thus dealt with us? behold, thy father and I have sought thee sorrowing.49 And he said unto them, How is it that ye sought me? wist ye not that I must be about my Father’s business?

The presenters; from Jeffery Olsen, whose wife and infant son transitioned in an auto accident 20 years ago, to Tom Zuba, who has had two children and a wife transition on separate occasions, to Suzanne Giesemann, whose daughter Susan was struck by lightning which launched Suzanne’s transition into being one of the world’s best mediums, all were not only sharing inspirational stories. As someone would at a business conference, they were giving presentations on how we go about the business we are in, the business of shining light in this world and making it a better place.  How do we turn these tragedies into something meaningful?  How do we complete our missions laid out in our soul plans? (Sara Ruble)  The conversations we had in the hallways, by the pool, at the bar, and back in our rooms (thanks Tracy and Heidi for hosting the hospitality suite) were all shop talk.  It’s not the type of business we get paid in dollars for, but we are certainly enriched by our participation in it.  We do get paid.

To those two people I didn’t get the chance to talk actually dollars and cents business with this week, we’ll have to do it now that we’re back in the real world.  This past week was about Spirit’s business.

Two years ago, on our first family vacation without Shayna in the body, we stayed in Phoenix and took a trip up to the Garland Canyon, stopping in Sedona for a night and a day. This trip for, for the HPH conference, we decide to take a day trip to Sedona. Kayla had hurt her ankle on the way to Phoenix, so we did not get the chance to visit a vortex while we were here last time. We pack up for the day. I’m trying to decide whether to take my favorite sunglasses or not. They are very fragile, irreplaceable, and precious to me. I even hesitated to bring them to Arizona. I commented several times that when they break, I’m going to be devastated. I don’t take them places where I’m going to be putting them on an off. I put them in a hard case deciding they are no good if I never wear them.


We get the chance to hang out with Nicole Reilly, a New Orleans medium we all met at AREI last September. Since then Nicole has worked quite a bit with HPH. Tracy, my little sister that I bicker with constantly, Beth, the Air Force Colonel, Tywana, and I pile into Nicole’s rental for the two hour drive from the low desert to the high desert. At 4,000 feet the scenery in Sedona is quite amazing and this time I’m not driving so I get to enjoy the sweeping vistas and watching as the landscape and vegetation changes as we make the climb.


On the way up, we talk about HPH, the state of the mediumship industry, whether reincarnation is real- you know the small stuff like that. It’s been fascinating engaging in conversations with so many mediums over the last couple days. In our community, mediums are treated a lot like pastors. They can be put on a pedestal. People forget they are human, full of human foibles. They have egos. They have to make a living. They are not omniscient. And, sometimes mediums forget these things too. First and foremost they have a sacred obligation to serve Spirit. The back biting, the accusations of fraud, the jealousy, the prima donna behavior, it’s disappointing. But, they are humans. We all do the best we can with what we’ve got.


We get to Sedona and decide to hit a vortex first. But, it’s confusing as to how to get to one. The crowds are incredibly large for an overcast, chilly Monday. It’s barely over 70 degrees. Everyone is wearing jackets. There is no sun. We spot the Chapel of the Holy Cross and make our way up there. We find a parking spot, barely, and make our way inside. It’s overcast, the chapel is dark. I take off my sunglasses and put them in my pocket. A couple of people mention they are feeling dizzy. I don’t comment as focusing on the lightheaded feeling I have when I travel like this only exacerbates it. I feel it too as we climb up and down to and from the chapel. As I head down the stairwell to the gift shop I lightly brush against the handrail. I hear a faint pop as one of the lenses pops out of the glasses. They’re broken. Oh well. Maybe I manifested this by talking about it so much. I look on the bright side though. Ironically, the bright side is it’s completely overcast in Sedona and I don’t need them. Maybe I’ll have them repaired for the third time. Maybe it’s time to let them go.


We decide spontaneously to take a desert Jeep tour. I don’t do spontaneous, but I’m outnumbered four to one. It’s just after noon. There is no way, as crowded as Sedona is, and as late in the day as it is that any of the Jeep rental places will have room for five people. The first place we call has room for five on their 1:30 tour. We have to check in by 1:00. I guess it was meant to be.


We do some shopping. I am able to dart in and out of the various locations in this little outdoor mall, not having to stand in one place for to long. Moving helps with the dizziness. As Tracy and I are standing in one shop, she points out a toy gun that she says she would have bought for her 29 year old son, Aymen. Aymen went to the University of Alabama and the entire family is all about Alabama. Just as the name Aymen passes her lips, on the store’s music system Sweet Home Alabama strikes up. Tracy looks at me, eyes wide open, mouth agape. I said “Tracy, you just spoke his name and the song started playing.” On the way home we will discuss how these things work. My theory is that the song was in the queue already. Aymen didn’t make the song play. But, he might have manipulated us into this shop at this moment and put the thought into Tracy’s head in perfect timing. This is one of innumerable synchronicities from this weekend.


We finish shopping and take the Jeep tour. The tour was great. We laughed and laughed. Between the laughter and the kidney destroying bumps, it was a memorable tour.


Finally, after the tour, we make our way to Boynton Canyon vortex. We park the car and take the trail up to the vortex. As we are walking along the path, a guy stops Nicole and says he has something for her. He hands her a heart shaped red rock made of the native sandstone. Then he hands one to each of us a begins his speech about unconditional love, transforming the world, the Masters all taught this same thing, yadda, yadda, yadda. We all nod in agreement and maybe he could tell from the looks on our faces and how Tracy was tearing up that he was indeed preaching to the choir. We thank him and move up the trail half expecting that if we turn around, he will have disappeared.


As we make our way up the trail, I spot an agave plant about to bloom. These plants live for usually 10-25 years. Sometimes as long as 80 years. They bloom once in a lifetime. Once they bloom, they die. I learned this on our Jeep tour. So, it’s really cool to then see one growing the stalk in preparation for that once in a lifetime event.


We reach the apex of our climb and move off the trail where we find a fallen tree that will make a nice bench for our meditation. Nicole, a hypnotherapist as well as a medium, leads us in a guided meditation. As she begins, our eyes are closed, and we are taking in our first deep breaths, birds start to sing. We have heard no bird songs since we started the hike. I am tempted to open my eyes and look to see where the birds are, but I keep them closed and express gratitude for the serenade. As suddenly as they started. They stopped.


I hold my hands out and try to feel Shayna’s hands in mine. I hold her hands and feel the energy of the vortex enhancing my connection. Nicole asks us to imagine our kids forehead to forehead with us, touching. I feel Shayna there and hear her tell me that she is proud of what I am doing, not just at this moment or even this weekend, but overall. And she tells me I don’t have to come here or go anywhere to feel her because she is always with me.


The meditation ends all too soon. I could stay in this state for hours. The women start to chatter. I dry the tears that are rolling and sit in inner silence for a while. Nicole hasn’t had a child transition, but her father recently crossed. She got her first visit from him during our meditation as he pressed his forehead to hers. Father to daughter, for her, daughter to father for Shayna and me.


I find out Tywana has brought some of Shayna’s ashes with us as she pulls them out to spread them under the tree we meditated under. Tracy and Beth are headed back down the trail like two women on a mission. Nicole lingers behind as Tywana and are checking out the vegetation around. Nicole says she feels like there is something she is supposed to find. We start to help her look even though we don’t know what we are looking for. As Nicole reaches the spot where Tywana was sitting she bends down and picks up a perfectly heart shaped rock. At the same moment, I see one at my feet.


We descend the trail, get back to the car and Tracy and I begin bickering again, entertaining ourselves on the drive back to Phoenix. Sedona was magical the second time, too.

Today is the first full day of the First Annual Helping Parents Heal conference. Nearly 500 parents from around the globe are gathered in Scottsdale, AZ. The one thing we have in common is we have each experienced the greatest tragedy that can befall someone, the passing of one or more of our children. Tom Zumba, our after dinner keynote speaker, has had an 18 month old daughter, 13 year old son and 43 year old wife precede him. How is this guy even walking around? I am in awe of these people.

The first speaker of the day is Suzanne Giesemann. I consider Suzanne to be a personal friend, more like a family member since meeting her 14 months ago at a weekend workshop she led with my buddy Mark Pitstick. Suzanne is not only one of the best mediums in the world, she has as high a level of integrity as anyone I have ever met. She gave us a reading after the conference and has called or texted several times since to tell us that Shayna has dropped in on her with a message for us. We met Suzanne in person again 7 months ago at this same hotel where she spoke to AREI. At this conference, I have seen almost all of the presenters before and have personal relationships with many of them. For several of us attendees, and some presenters, this is our third time together in 14 months. We are in daily communication with many of them. This is more like a family reunion than a conference.

I have seen Suzanne present several times before both live and via video conferencing. She has told some us to not miss her 8 AM on Saturday morning keynote because it’s going to be something special. I know Suzanne’s presentation skills. So, when she says that I know it’s going to be truly amazing.

What ensues is probably the single best presentation I have ever seen with evidence for the afterlife. Suzanne is not a natural born medium, like many of the mediums here. She did not see spirit at a young age, have an NDE that gave her the gift, or anything of the sort. Suzanne began her quest for making this connection after her daughter Susan, who was six months pregnant, was struck and killed by lightning. Suzanne has worked long and hard to get where she is and I have been witness to her growth over the last 14 months. It’s inspiring. I feel like Suzanne is a kindred spirit.

Suzanne has woven together a creation story of how and why we as souls incarnate in the first place and magic that binds us all together. She brings together absolutely unbelievable evidence that she has a connection with our kids in the Everlife (a term coined by Sanaya, her spirit team). She is using a happy thought bubble, just a little happy thought image as the theme for her presentation. It triggers a connection for me immediately.

If I didn’t know Suzanne and if the parents of most of the kids she has used in her presentation were not present in the room I might think she was making some of this up. The evidence that our kids are not only alive and well, but are still involved in our day to day mundane lives is undeniable. She tells stories of child after child who has come to her in readings saying “I’m still right here, and I can prove it.” Some of these stories I know because she has reported them contemporaneously. Some of them are about kids of our friends. Heidi’s Grace, Tracy’s Aymen- we tease Heidi about being an awful sitter for a reading. We support Tracy as her beloved Aymen appears. Their shining faces appear on the screen as part of the narrative. These are true messages of hope.

I haven’t looked at my watch, but the end of the presentation is approaching. I can sense her coming to the conclusion. The stories were grouped together to form themes. Shayna has been in many of Suzanne’s presentations since making some incredible drop ins on Suzanne, but it looks like she’s not going to be in this one. I’m a little disappointed, but OK with it. Suzanne’s got a lot of material in here I have never seen. You can only fit so many stories into a presentation. Shayna has probably been edited our. She didn’t make the cut. It’s all right. And, the happy thought bubble was really cool anyway because that reminded me of one of Shayna’s drop ins on Suzanne.

I’m thinking about the next presentation when I see Shayna’s beautiful face appear on the screen in front of my eyes. Suzanne has saved Shayna for last and she did recognize the connection to the happy thought bubble that the volleyball presented to us after Shayna transitioned. It hangs above the sink in the kitchen. Shayna showed a vision of it to Suzanne who had no idea what it was just that it was a small orb that reflected light and was kind of like a Christmas ornament.

Suzanne goes on to share another drop in Shayna did on her and maybe something else. I don’t know because by this point I am sobbing uncontrollably and can’t listen. I knew my emotions would well over at some point this weekend. The weekend began yesterday with a slideshow of our kids faces. I could not watch. Other parents were looking for their kids’ faces. I typically look at pictures of Shayna in private.

As the tears are flowing and my lip is quivering, I realize my tears are not only because I miss my Beautiful Light. I am bursting with pride. I think back to when Tywana and Shayna would argue about whether Shayna would be famous some day. Shayna would say no. Tywana would say yes. Shayna had already had her picture in Ebony magazine. From the night she was born we knew she was a force to be reckoned with. The nurses told us we had our hands full. When she was two years old I said “I hope she uses her power for good, not for evil.” 18 years later, after her transition, here she is, a featured part of Suzanne Giesemann’s keynote presentation to nearly 500 people and live-streaming out to the world. I know, with absolutely no doubt, that my baby is still kicking butt and taking names from where she is now. She is cheering us on here and leading us. She is still sending ripples out into this world.

In the following hours I finish up the rest of the presentations and head back to the room to meditate. I listen to one of Suzanne’s mediumship training meditations and try to tune into Shayna. And, she comes to me. I’ve been thinking of how I’m going to avoid the graduation parties coming up. This would be her senior year. I can’t bring myself to go. Then, it hits me. This is Shayna’s graduation celebration. This entire week in Arizona is because of her. I am having a graduation party with her with my new family. She has graduated, as have all our children. Their lessons in Earth school behind them, they have gone on to do their work from the Other Side. I could not be more proud of what she has accomplished and continues to accomplish. And I am honored to be a part of it.

Today I get the news that a woman I met just over a year ago has been given three to six months to live. That’s the way we phrase it. “The doctor gave her three to six months.” Nope. Doctors don’t give us time to live. Doctors give us a prognosis, which can be right or wrong.  Anita Moorjani was given hours to live in 2006 when her body was riddled with cancer and she lay “dying” in a hospital.  In 2018, she’s cancer free.  So, there’s always a chance the doctors are wrong this time.

However, the doctors are often fairly right and we have to accept that our lovely sister may be saying good-bye soon. I met her last February, just over a year ago. I have seen her face-to-face only a couple of times, even though we remain connected via social media. She’s short in stature, but a giant in spirit; a force to be reckoned with. Just thinking about her brings a smile to your face. I met her as part of the Serving Spirit class I attended and she roped Tywana and I into a Facebook group, which I later found out is a mediumship development class.  We have become fdamily with these people. And, since our focus is always the continuation of life, we are more aware than most groups that we will not always be together in the flesh. Some of us have speculated about which of us will return Home first.  We are all of a “certain age”, knowing that the odds grow greater with each passing day that one of will return.

When I got the news, I thought “No, her light cannot be put out.  We can’t lose her.”  She’s a warrior in this fight to shift consciousness of the planet. She has brought so many us together. She has inspired us with her fight. Then I realized “No we cannot lose her.” Literally, we cannot.  When she makes her transition, her light will not go out. It will shine brighter than ever before. I know she will be more of a force over there than she is here and I know that she will continue to work with us and through us as we complete our missions and return Home, one by one.

Observing the responses of the group has been fascinating. Tears have been shed. Tears will be shed. But, the joy and the love of the group is palpable as our faith is put to the test. Joy and pain are inseparable on this plane.  We feel joy for her upcoming graduation and her reunion with her loved ones who have gone before.  We feel pain in anticipation of the temporary separation which can feel permanent as long as we’re on this side. She is and shall remain a shining star regardless of what happens to her body.

Shayna likes to turn the ceiling light on for us.  Often when we go up to bed at night, it’ll be on. Tywana always acknowledges it.  It was on last night when we went up to bed. More rarely, she turns it on in the morning, usually around the time I get up, between 6:30 and 7. This morning, it came on at 6:24.  Tywana noted it’s Shayna’s angelversary date- 06/24/15.