On Sunday, Sheri Perl spoke to the Helping Parents Heal UK group about Electronic Voice Phenomena. Sheri described what EVP is, as well as explained a little bit about how to do it.

EVP is a way of communicating with spirit through the use of sound recordings. It’s almost like a telephone to spirit. You ask questions while playing a sound source in the background which you record. The responses from spirit are not usually heard until the recorded sound is played back and carefully audited. We don’t know how they do it, however, through thought and concentration spirit is able to influence the sound that we provide into audible words that we can understand. Although there are various sound sources that can be used, most often we use human speech which is digitally chopped up into unintelligible gibberish. Upon playback, actual messages, which were imprinted by spirit into the gibberish can be heard. For those of you interested in trying this yourselves, Sheri has created a user-friendly slideshow designed for both Mac and PC users that literally walks you through the steps necessary to configure your computer to record EVPs. This program can be downloaded for free at: http://sheriperl.com/evpguide

Through working with an electronic sound source made by ITC Researcher Keith Clark (idigitalmedium.com) Sheri has developed the ability to hear long messages from spirit and to take dictation directly from the recording. This is not technically Electronic Voice Phenomenon because EVP should create a message that just about anyone can hear, which is not the case using this kind of sound source. Therefore, Sheri calls what she does Electronic Assisted Clairaudience, because although she uses an electronic sound source to hear the messages, her ability to hear rests in what is called clairaudience.

Just before our meeting began, Sheri opened her clairaudient line and ask if there was anything that she should be sure to mention. Her son Danny immediately came through with a message from the children. We know from experience that the kids typically gather when we are having these meetings. Her son expressed that the message was for all the parents who would be attending the meeting, however, I believe it’s for all of us. Keep in mind that a typical EVP is not usually longer than a few seconds. This transmission is about three minutes long.

Every once in a while I hit what I feel is a brick wall.  Yesterday afternoon was one of those times. It just came on me. What I’m doing is not working. I’ve got to do something different, now. I’ve been working, and working, and working some more trying to turn the business around.  I never have any less than three major projects going at a time. These are not small tweaks, but major overhauls.  I’m looking for signs from angels and guides. I’m doing guided meditations. I’m doing affirmations. But, the thoughts always come “Am I doing the right thing?  Isn’t this supposed to be easy when you’re in ‘the flow’?”  Today, I throw my hands up. I’m done. A few days ago my friend asked if I had thought about selling the business.  Yeah. Maybe if I had some other skill.  I can’t retire right now. I’m pretty sure trying to make a living as an Uber driver isn’t the way I want to go. I can’t give up.  But, I sure want to give up. When I hit these points, I try something else. I take an hour and compose an email. The idea for it’s been forming for a while. I was going to create it as an ad. I fire it out to the 20,650 people on our email list.  Maybe I can entice a few of them into buying something.

I rarely share these thoughts with Tywana. I don’t want to burden her with it, but I know I’m in a foul mood and if I don’t it’ll just come out directed at her since she’s the only one around.  As always, she gives me encouragement. I set this aside, for now, we make dinner, watch a little TV, and head off to bed.

During the night, the thoughts are swirling again.  I know I’m OK for now. Thankfully, during the good years, we put aside a fair amount of money, for retirement. We’re not desperate. I know I’ll be OK, in the long term. You can’t take money with you. There’s no point in hoarding it. I just need enough to get from here to there. That’s where the fear enters. I wonder if I’m doing the right thing. I’ve been taught that success comes with hard work and talent. I know I’m working hard. And, at the risk of sounding immodest, I’m pretty talented when it comes to my business.

I wake up with the image of a fork in the road. One the left path is the path I’ve been on. The right path is unknown. Literally, I have no idea what I would do if this business doesn’t turn around. But, sitting across the road is a brick wall. I’m blocked from taking either path. What do I do? Then, the image of the Thai boys who were just rescued from the cave comes to mind. They were trapped in a cave over a mile underground and several miles from the nearest entrance. There was water between them and the entrance, miles of swimming underwater with scuba gear. They had no way out. So, what did they do when there was nothing to do? They sat. Their leader had studied Buddhism and meditation. They kept themselves calm and they waited for their rescue. And, they were rescued.  Panicking would have done them no good. When you’ve done all you can do, you stay calm and you wait. I’ve decided that, for now, I have to be like the boys in the cave. I’ve been doing, doing, doing. I need to take a beat and see what happens, wait for some of the seeds I’ve planted to grow.

So, as this post was coming together in my head, I had the image of the fork in the road and a brick wall to use as the featured image. That was the initial image I had in mind. I thought about using the Thai boyscouts also. I knew I wouldn’t be able to find an image of a brick wall on a road, so I was thinking about Photoshopping one together.  I decide to jump on Facebook and the second post I see has this image.

I spent this weekend at my sister-in-law’s house in West Virginia, my mother’s place of birth. Family was on my mind as I was with my wife’s family gathered to celebrate my nephew’s upcoming wedding. My birth family was in Chicago at a family reunion. Friday night, I had one of my weird dreams that I won’t publish, but it’s one of the dreams where I’m being embarrassed by creating a mess. My goal in the dream is to keep others from finding out about it. My family, who were gathered with me in West Virginia were just outside and I was trying to get things cleaned up before I was exposed. I have had variations of this dream since I was a child. The dream was semi-lucid in that during the dream, I realized it was just a dream and was able to relax a bit because I knew as soon as I woke up, none of them would know what they had seen in the dream. As I took my walk this morning, I was listening to a podcast about lucid dreaming and the significance of this dream came to me. A big fear of mine is being exposed as a failure.

Then, I had a dream about Granddaddy.  My mother’s father lived with us for a short time before he passed away suddenly in 1968. I don’t recall ever dreaming about him before. Granddaddy’s death had a profound impact on me because I was 7 years old when he passed. He had gone back to West Virginia to visit. I was in Columbus. The story I heard is that he stood up in church to give his testimony and while he was testifying, he had a massive heart attack and died. From my 7-year-old perspective, he had simply disappeared.  He left the house and never returned. This is when I began to question the safety of this universe and the compassion of God. How could he be here one minute and gone the next? Why didn’t God protect him? He was obviously a good man, he died in church. If you’re not safe in church, where are you safe? Granddaddy’s death played a huge role in how I perceived the world and still does, 50 years later. In my dream, I saw his face clearly. He spoke to me. I don’t recall what he said. I don’t remember him well, mostly from pictures. I did see him clearly though. He appeared to be the same age as he was when he passed. I got the impression that the anniversary of his death was coming up. I woke up wondering if maybe he had died on this day all those years ago. I couldn’t even remember the year he passed.

My father has an online family tree. I don’t know how to get to it. I thought of texting my brother and asking him to look up the date that Grandaddy died. But, he was in Chicago with his family. It could wait. I’ll wait to text him when he gets back home. How wild would it be if I had that dream on the anniversary of Granddaddy’s passing?

Well, it would be wild, but it was not to be.  This is not the anniversary of Granddaddy’s passing. When I got back home I got onto Facebook and was scrolling through my newsfeed when I saw this picture posted by my cousin. We share this grandfather, but she never met him since he was gone long before she was born.  Granddaddy didn’t die in July. I had the dream on July 27th.  He passed on October 20. But, there is an anniversary coming up. It was October 20, 1968. This October it will be 50 years. 50 years since I last saw him. What I know now is his death wasn’t a death at all. God didn’t let him down that day in church, God took him Home. While he disappeared from my life, he did not disappear, he was given what he had been looking forward to. It was his time.

So, there was no magic of having this dream on the actual anniversary of his death. But, I do think it’s pretty amazing that I was thinking about his passing and before I could find out from my brother what the date of his passing was my question was answered by this post from my cousin.

Getting a picture in my head of what the afterlife is like is something I’ve struggled with since I first heard of “heaven”.  Church had me wondering. Do we sit around on clouds? Do we have to learn to play the harp? Do we sing hymns all day long? Then, the New Age people said we just become blobs of light. That sounds super boring to me.  I kind of like having a body. I like eating. I like playing golf. I envision having the time to work on my golf game the way I want. I envision learning to play the guitar. Given enough time, maybe I could be decent. Try as I might, I cannot picture the “afterlife” as real.  It seems very dreamlike to me. It’s fuzzy, out of focus.  The one thing that brings it into focus for me is to listen to the words of someone who has been there. Then, for a few minutes anyway, it becomes real to me. It’s almost as if I can remember it.

I can’t get enough of hearing NDEs. Last night, we had a speaker at Helping Parents Heal who experienced a very detailed NDE several years ago that answered a lot of the questions we all have about the afterlife. Generally, I like veridical NDEs, NDEs that are supported by evidence. If the person saw something that they couldn’t have possibly seen with their physical eyes, like a shoe on the ledge outside of the building or what a loved one was wearing several states away or down the hall; if they overheard a conversation taking place outside of the hospital room, things like that, we can know something about their experience was real.  John’s NDE didn’t have that evidence. He bypassed the experience of seeing his body on the operating room table.  He had no contact with this world from where he was.  So, how do I trust him?  First, his NDE occurred over 30 years ago.  He just recently started telling his story publicly after prompting from people in afterlife groups he is in. However, he has been telling the story in his own circles for all of those decades. If he was going to make it up to seek attention or to cash in, why would he wait so long?  Second, he hasn’t written a book nor does he have a website. He is not profiting from this. Third, his demeanor. He comes across as genuine to me. And, lastly, when pressed for answers to questions, if John didn’t have direct knowledge of the answer, he didn’t make it up. Our group asked a lot of questions which John simply said he didn’t have the answers to.  So, I believe the guy.

He talked about how we are received when we cross over.  It’s maybe not what you expect.  He talked where we go to various buildings for various functions in planning this life and upon our return to our real Home. He talked about what we do for recreation and employment. Yes, we do have jobs. However, we don’t work for pay. And, play… man do we get to play!

John was gracious enough to allow me to post the video, unlisted on YouTube. You won’t find it by searching.  You can only get there with this link.


Part of the collateral beauty of living this life I’m living now is I have the opportunity to interact with some of the best healers, spiritual teachers, mediums, etc. in the world. Just this week I’ve been on calls with people in London and Australia. Tomorrow night I get to talk to a guy who had an NDE like none I’ve ever heard before. Last night, our HPH Online Group hosted Elizabeth Robinson.  Elizabeth is an intuitive, a trained counselor, coach, and Hay House author (There Are No Goodbyes).  It’s a pretty good gig, but I’d give it all up to have Shayna back.

For an hour and a half, Elizabeth shared with us about her life’s journey that has led her to this point and the wisdom Spirit has given her. Forty plus parents sat transfixed as we took it all in. As usual, we had a ton of questions. Why all the pain? Is this soul planned?  Murders?  Suicides?  Why us? Why our kids? Why?

Near the end, Elizabeth said something incredibly profound. I’ve heard it before, but I need to listen to it again, and again, and again. I need to hear it over and over because my humanity rejects it. Suzanne Giesemann has channeled Sanaya saying it.  Others have told me this same thing. We imagine the ideal life as being free from trouble. Healthy, wealthy, and with no challenges is the way my humanity wants to go through life. But, that’s not what my soul craves. My soul desires growth. If I actually wanted to live a cushy life, I would never have incarnated into this world where Jesus proclaimed we would have tribulation. Not we probably will have trouble, not we might have trouble. We will have trouble. If you look at someone, thinking their life is perfect, just get to know them a bit. None of us gets out of here unscathed.

Elizabeth said the “The ideal life challenges and changes.” What we, as humans, think of as the ideal life is not going to challenge us or change us. Many of us genuinely start on the journey of awakening and self-awareness when the tragedy, we would never have planned as humans, comes into our life. Our humanity rejects what our souls crave.

As much as I know this, I still pray for comfort. I still pray for relief. I still wish I could go back three years or forward thirty; I don’t care which, just get me out of here. And, that’s OK. That’s human. That’s part of it. Meanwhile, my higher self and my Team is saying “Hang in there. This is the ideal life. This is the one you signed up for, the life that challenges and changes. You can rest when you’re ‘dead'”.



Today is Tywana’s birthday.  55 years on the planet.  We’ve been married 27-1/2 years.  Half of her life she has chosen to be just with me.  The last three years of the 27 have been the most difficult, but probably the most productive in terms of soul growth.

As I come back into this world this morning waking from my slumber, I reflect on our time together. In some ways, we are very different people.  In other ways, we are very much the same.  We are truly partners in every sense of the word.  We are business partners. We partnered raising the girls. We collaborate on just about every decision from paint color to what direction we’re going to take the business. I am blessed to have found her at the gym over 30 years ago at this point in time.

It’s not all sunshine and roses.  I’m not easy to live with. This is especially true over the last three years. I am appreciative of her patience with me as I continue to struggle to reintegrate into a world that is even more foreign to me than it was before. I don’t take it for granted.  It’s widely quoted that up to 90% of couples who suffer the death of a child also suffer the death of their marriage.  I, in fact, believed that right up until a moment ago when I found out that is a myth.  The death of a child does have a profound impact on a marriage and will expose and test any cracks that are there.  On the other hand, the death of a child, gives a couple a shared experience to walk through together, an experience that can, in fact, draw the couple closer. While the stress has taken its toll, the shared experience has made us realize just how much we have in common.

I have seen remarkable growth in Tywana over the past three years.  The Tywana of June 24 when Shayna made her transition has matured and blossomed in ways I don’t think either of us thought possible in this lifetime.

Today, we celebrate this milestone, this achievement. Happy Birthday, Tywana.  Thanks for sharing your life with me.

In February of 2017, Tywana and I took a trip to Florida to a conference hosted by Suzanne Giesemann and Mark Pitstick. The conference was titled Back To Your Center. I wrote about it at the time (around day 609). Suzanne felt called to give us a reading after the conference. So, a few days after we returned home, we had a reading with her. Shayna has been dropping on in her ever since.

As in most readings, there were things we could connect to and things that left us scratching our heads. One of those things that left us scratching our heads was when Suzanne said “Why would just say soul sistah? s-i-s-t-a-h. Just like that. That’s the way it sounded it. That’s the way I see it. There’s someone I think I haven’t mentioned. Did she have a really close friend who’s really hurting?”  This was very generic as far as the friend goes. Suzanne didn’t get a name or a description. So, we forgot all about this reference.

Fast forward to September 2017. Seven months later. Tywana and I go to AREI. At the conference in February, we had met Tracy Soussi and Beth West, and Irene Vouvalides.  Tracy, Beth, Tywana, and I have become group leaders for Helping Parents Heal Online Group.  At the conference are several more members of Helping Parents Heal, we had not yet met. Of those people, Tywana and seven others form a bond and start calling themselves the Phoenix 8.  They text daily (many times a day).  Sometime after that, Tracy comes up with the idea of calling the group The Soul Sistas. This is the name that sticks.

Today, almost a year after the initial meeting of the four, and almost a year and a half after Suzanne says “Why would she just say soul sistah?”, Tywana is listening to the recording of the reading and hears Suzanne’s reference and freaks out. Soul Sistas has become an integral part of her life and Suzanne mentioned it months before Tywana would even meet half of the Soul Sistas.

Tracy asked if this means Suzanne is psychic. Well, all mediums are psychic. Not all psychics are mediums. Does this mean that Suzanne can predict the future? This did not come from Suzanne. This came from Shayna.  Time is different on the Other Side.  I don’t think we’ll ever understand it fully as long as we’re here. When I was wrestling with Christian theology back in the day people would struggle with free will versus God being omniscient- including knowing future events. Did God’s foreknowledge negate our free will?  I liken it to watching a movie that you’ve seen before. You know what’s going to happen, but you don’t cause it to happen.

What we do know is it’s a good idea to record your medium readings and to refer back to them every once in a while. Often something will come through that makes no sense at the time because it hasn’t happened yet. I’ve included the audio clip below.

The Soul Sistas at the First Annual HPH Conference- 14 months after Suzanne first said “Soul Sistah”

A couple of days ago Kayla and I went to see Amy Lee (Evanescence) and Lindsey Stirling in concert. This was Kayla’s first major concert experience. She had seen Morgan James with the Kentucky Symphony Orchestra and Black Violin.  She’s also been to the Cincinnati Symphony Orchestra. Evanescence is touring in support of their Synthesis album, which is done with a full orchestra. Lindsey Stirling is a violinist who combines ballet dancing with Michael Jackson like moves into her show. I’m maybe more excited about this concert than any I’ve ever seen. I’ve seen Stevie Wonder, Whitney Houston, Earth, Wind & Fire, some great shows. I’ve seen Morgan James in a couple of intimate venues and with a full orchestra. However, seeing Amy Lee with a full orchestra, and Evanescence I know will be an experience like no other.  I wonder how I’ll react when she comes on stage because her voice always, without fail, gives me goosebumps. Her songs often bring me to tears. I can’t cry in front of Kayla, but if it happens, it happens.

I adore Evanescence’s first album. The music is excellent and there are some songs with very moving lyrics. To think that Amy was 20 when the album was put out and to have a song with the depth of “My Immortal” blows my mind.  Their second album did not impress me. There are only two or three songs that I like much from that albums. So, when their third album finally came out in 2012, I wasn’t even aware until after the time Shayna had passed.  The girls and I used to watch the video from My Immortal and they both listened to the first album. I was in love with Amy Lee, but Evanescence, not so much.  I heard that the 2012 record was different from their second album so I decided to give it a listen.  This was just weeks after Shayna had passed and I was doing a lot of walking and listening to music to clear my head.  I gave the album a try. It was as if the album was written just for me. The key to an artist connecting to us I think is to take what is their personal experience, make it universal, give it to us, and we translate it back into our own experiences.  At the time I wondered what type of loss Amy must have experienced in her young life to write and sing with such passion about themes like loss, longing, dealing with seemingly unbearable pain, and hope for a better future.

Songs 4, 5, 7, 9, 11, 12, and 16- My Heart Is Broken, The Other Side (Counting the Days), Lost In Paradise, End of the Dream, Never Go Back, Swimming Home (I can just picture Shayna going Home when I listen to this one), and Secret Door touched me to my very core.  My Heart is Broken is the feeling we have when they first leave. Then, we’re counting the days until we meet them on The Other Side.  We wander this Earth only half alive Lost in Paradise. We long for the End of the Dream, but we have hope knowing it will come.  No dream lasts forever. Never Go Back is that feeling we have when we want to go back but we know the only way out is forward.  The old days are behind us.  Swimming Home I imagine is that feeling that people report from NDEs.  They’re going Home. They still love us, but they’re being called Home and cannot resist that siren call. Finally, Secret Door is when our time finally comes and we get to fly Home through that Secret Door.

Anyway, back to the concert.  There was warm-up act- Cellogram.  He was just OK.  Now, out comes Lindsey.  I’ve seen her videos and know about her dancing.  What surprises me is she tours with a dance company. This isn’t just her standing the middle of the stage playing the violin. She does about five costume changes and dances for the entire hour and a half set.  A few songs into her set, she does Shatter Me from one of her albums, and Amy Lee walks out to do the vocals for the song. Lzzy Hale sings the song on Lindsey’s album. Sorry Lzzy Hale, I’ll never hear Shatter Me the same way again after hearing Amy sing it.

Lindsey’s done her set, and now it’s time for Amy Lee, I mean Evanescence. As I said, I’ve been to a few symphony performances. I’ve seen some rock/pop concerts. I have never felt the energy coming from the music the way I did from this combination of Amy Lee’s powerful voice, the lyrics that touch the soul, the band, and the full orchestra; which was used to perfection. I sat in my seat for 3-1/2 hours (except for standing for ovations and on a couple of songs).  I was completely enthralled. The fear of over-anticipation ruining the actual event was unwarranted. It was everything I hoped for and more.

Even though almost every single song made me think of Shayna, I was able to keep my composure during the concert.  Lots of goosebumps, but no tears. I belted out the lyrics I knew to the sky. I sent waves of love and gratitude to Amy for expressing so exquisitely what I cannot convey on my own. I hoped she felt the love that I and thousands of others were sending to her in waves. Interestingly, I most connect with the songs from the third album, the one I listened to the summer of 2015.  But, when she sang My Immortal something happened that I have never experienced before.  I’m not sure why except maybe that is the song Shayna most connects to since she didn’t hear the third album while she was in the flesh. I felt that Shayna’s energy was right there with me. I felt her presence in a way I’m not sure I ever have. I was sitting in my seat, and I felt an electrical charge from head to toe.  It was a sort of buzzing. I felt as if she sat in me. Not on me, not on my lap, it was as if her energy body sat in my seat with me and merged into me. This is the opening of the song:

I’m so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
‘Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won’t leave me alone


A couple of weeks ago I told Tywana that I have so many shorts in my closet that I cannot get through wearing them all in a season. Yet, I buy more.  This summer I’ve acquired another pair, free in exchange for a review, and I bought a pair at Costco just because of the price. I didn’t really need them. I bought them probably a month ago. I haven’t worn them yet. They sit, with the tags still attached atop the pile on the shelf in my closet. So, when I was surfing Facebook and saw a Groupon for more shorts, I scrolled right by. Except, I didn’t.

They were $12.99. $12.99 for “designer” cargo shorts. That’s too cheap to pass by. I clicked on the ad. They had white, black, khaki, green, and red.  I have more than enough black shorts, I thought.  Don’t need khaki.  Don’t need green. Don’t want white.  By now I should have stopped looking, but I didn’t. Red. I don’t have much red.  Do I have any red shorts?  Yes, but just one pair. These are different. I could justify buying these. I put them in my shopping cart and started the checkout process.  With taxes and shipping, they’ll still be less than $19.  I can’t pass this deal up.  I need a second pair of red shorts.  Wait!  Stop!  What am I doing?  All the time I’m harping on Tywana about “saving money” by buying something we don’t need.  In a moment of clarity, I come out of the retail therapy induced coma and into full consciousness and I close down the browser.  I have truly saved money now because I didn’t buy the shorts I absolutely do not need.

The next day, my friend Annie tags me on this video. “Greed: The Fatal Desire“. The title has a double meaning. The film ties the need we have for more and more stuff together with our denial of the fact we are mortal. By acquiring stuff, we are assuming we’ll be around to use it. In a perverse way, we think the more stuff we have the longer we’ll extend our lives. Greed is a way we have of coping with our mortality.  The other side of greed is we are greedy to the point where we are destroying the very planet we need to live on.  Greed is a natural result of living in a world of limited resources. Evolution has built into us the desire to acquire enough to survive.  Ironically, a skill that allows us to survive in one environment can become fatal if not curbed when the environment changes. The fight or flight response that keeps us safe from lions and tigers and bears can kill us if it’s on 24/7 in our suburban existence, stressed about paying bills.  The greed that drives us to acquire enough resources to live is killing us as we have turned it into a consumeristic society destroying the planet to produce and consume crap that nobody needs.

Of course, we know on one level that the acquisition of stuff can’t extend our lives. However, this is the way we act. I’ve often wondered about people who acquire billions of dollars and continue to amass more. Why do they do this? What is wrong with them? If you have a billion dollars and you spend $10,000 a day, how long would it take for you to run out of money? I’ll tell you. It would take 273 years.  None of us lives that long. Let’s assume you live 90 years, after you’ve become a billionaire.  You could spend $30,000 a day. So, why do people who have billions of dollars continue to amass more?  Fools, I always say. Then, I think about myself.  I don’t know how many shorts I even have.  I know I have more than enough to last for however long I’m going to be around. Yet, here I was about to buy more? Am I really so different from these people I criticize?

The film makes a lot of great points, some I have thought about before. Tying greed to the desire to be immortal is new to me. The fact that my greed is a big cause of my stress is brought into stark clarify. I’ve got to get a handle on it to learn to be satisfied with enough. I’m very glad I decided not to buy those shorts, even before I saw the film. A rare woke moment.


This is weird. The girls loved Highlights magazine. This came in the mail today. It’s a “sample” Highlights for our reception room. We don’t have a reception room. We are not a salon.

The name of the business it is addressed to is Shayna Elayne Beauty. We have never listed our business with this name. (the left image is the front of the magazine, the right is the back). Shayna’s name has never been on the business. When we first started, we used Shaykay Beauty, never Shayna Elayne anything. The address is on the upper part of the picture on the right.