This blog is dedicated to my beautiful daughter, Shayna Elayne Smith, who passed from this world in June 2015.

Shayna continues to guide, inspire, push, and prod me. She has shown me signs of her continued and remains a daily presence in my life.

She is my inspiration for the work I do.

Day 2145- Mother’s Day 2021

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This has been an interesting Mother’s Day. I realize I am fortunate to have my mother still here, given that I will be 60 in a few weeks. Most people my age don’t have both parents still alive and healthy. Sadly, due to COVID-19, I haven’t physically been in their presence since 2019 despite living […]

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Day 2139- May Is Mental Health Month

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19 years ago Kayla started school. We were just launching Treasured Locks, inspired by the need to find good products for the girls’ hair. Shayna was only two years old. So much has changed in those 19 years. Shayna passed six years ago, just after Kayla finished her first year of college. We thought Kayla […]

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I Ain’t No Ways Tired

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A couple of days ago my cousin made a Facebook post titled “I Ain’t No Ways Tired” the title of an old Negro spiritual. I replied, “Yes, I am tired.” This was the day after the verdict in the murder of George Floyd and the day after an officer shot and killed a 16-year-old Black […]

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Two Worlds Collide

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Please forgive any errors from the transcription software. I just wanted to get this down and don’t have a lot of time to spend cleaning it up. Brian Smith 0:01 Hey there, I wanted to document something happened. I want to start last week I’m recording this on Wednesday, April 7, 2021. So last week […]

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Day 2044- The New New Normal

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The saying goes, “ The only thing constant in life is change.” Here we go again. Four days ago my wife took a full-time job. This is the first time she’s worked full-time out of the house since Kyle was born over twenty-four years ago. I think of the days when the house was full. […]

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Day 2033- Turn Your Eyes

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When this world becomes overwhelming, I think of Home. Being human is hard because we are both this biological creation and divine simultaneously. We have to remain grounded to take care of the things of Earth. But, if we get too grounded, this world can be overwhelming. So, life is about balance, shifting that perspective […]

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Day 2028- Christmas 2020

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Christmas 2020 it’s the sixth Christmas since Shayna passed away in June of 2015. Over the years, I’ve learned not to anticipate Christmas as much as I used to-, whether I’m expecting it to be good or bad. Let’s just wait and see what the day brings is my new motto. Expectations lead to disappointment. […]

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Day 2024- Solipsism In My Dream

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My dreams have been becoming more lucid. They don’t always make sense. But, I find myself, in my dream, questioning the reality of the dream. I’ve begun to notice when things in the dream state don’t add up. In this recent dream, I was walking across a long walking bridge. There were several three-foot tall […]

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Grief 2 Growth Podcast Bonus Episode- 2,000 Days A.S.

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2,000 days 48,000 hours 5.479 years That’s how long it’s been since my life changed forever. June 24th, 2015 was the day that my daughter Shayna Elayne left this Earthly plane.  Today is December 14th, 2020 This morning I woke up and thought about how things have changed since June 24th, 2015. I got up, […]

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Day 1996- Shayna Wink

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Today, the day of my mother’s birthday, I received this email from a subscriber to my YouTube channel. Shayna is always up to something.   Good evening, Brian: I hope you and your family had gentle thanksgiving! I wanted to share something that I saw today on my way home from work, which brought me […]

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Day 1975- A Little Minx Sign

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This isn’t so much a sign from Shayna necessarily as a sign from the universe. Or maybe it is a sign from Shayna. You decide. Yesterday, I saw an ad for an app to create a daemon for myself as in the HBO Series His Dark Materials. After answering some questions, I got a spirit […]

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Medium Becky Hesseltine

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I had a reading with Becky Hesseltine as part of a certification program. The protocol was that she did not know my name or anything personal about me. I connected with her via Zoom. The meeting was set up by a third party. Until the moment I got on the call, Becky knew nothing about […]

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Day 1940- A Sign

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My friend, Kathy Wyenandt is running for State Senator. This morning is a foggy morning and I take my walk around sunrise, as I always do. There are tons of political signs in the yards now. No big deal. I note which of my neighbors are supporting who and I move along. As I’m headed […]

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Day 1932- Public Apology to Daniel John

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I am a host of some of the Helping Parents Heal meetings. I’ve seen Daniel John read before last night and during our interviews, he’s brought through little things about Shayna. Last night, as I was interviewing Daniel for Helping Parents Heal, he mentioned a sign that Shayna used to give us.He also told my […]

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Day 1764- Shayna Making Connections

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I don’t know exactly what is happening. Weird stuff has been happening in our house. My iPhone went unresponsive. Then, Tywana’s phone. Then, my iPad. Then, her Fitbit. All just weird random things that were eventually all fixed after several attempts. Kayla’s work laptop stopped working. Then, her personal laptop stopped working. Both were eventually […]

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