The good news is I don’t wake up to some terrifying thought. The bad news is I didn’t wake up. I didn’t sleep at all. Yesterday wore me out so much I could not fall asleep. Today will be tough. I have to finish the arrangements for Shayna Celebration of Life tomorrow. It is not […]
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To Bury or to Cremate
This is something you should think about before you die. Do your family this courtesy. But,my ou don’t expect to have to discuss their preference with your children. It might seem burial is the better option. No horrible images of your loved one’s body going up in flames. However, there are pros and cons to […]
Day 6- Overwhelming Meetings
Woke up sobbing as usual today. A cry first thing in the morning is the new normal. This time it was the realization that Shayna would become a “memory”. I don’ t want her to be a memory. Healing feels like letting her go. I can’t let go. I need to hold onto this pain […]
Getting Grief Right – The New York Times
Getting Grief Right – The New York Times The short answer is there is no “right” way to grieve.
Why This Blog
Shayna Elayne Smith is her name. Shayna is Hebrew for Beautiful. Elayne means light. Shayna was named Beautiful Light and that is precisely what she was while on Earth. Shayna was given to us on January 13, 2000 and taken from us suddenly on June 24, 2015. She passed peacefully in her sleep in her […]
What I Wish More People Understood About Losing A Child
What I Wish More People Understood About Losing A Child This is something everyone should know when you talk with a grieving parent.
Day 5- I Hate Waking Up
The small amounts of sleep I get are such sweet relief from this world. I wish I could just sleep until it’s time to join her again. As painful as just functioning with every thought focused on her is, I think the worst part is the waking up. Each day we begin life anew when we […]
Day 4- Ha Satan Whispers
Every morning when I wake up it’s a terrifying realization. “What is happening with her body now?” though I know intellectually she left it long ago.I go over all the things we will never do again. I count all the ways I will miss her. Today though there is something new. Satan whispers in my […]
Day 4- More Tears
I wake up today to more tears. A good cry every morning before getting out of bed is the new normal. My friends and family are rallying around me in unbelievable ways. Food has been brought to the house. Everyone asks what she can do. Gestures are made. Offers to do anything and everything I […]
Day 3- The Funeral Home and the call from the Coroner
Another day. I wake up to a glimmer of hope it’s a nightmare. It was just a glimmer of hope today less than yesterday, then it’s gone. Another 1,000 tears I had no idea there were so many ways to cry. Racking sobs of absolute devastation Weeping from deep sadness Tears of anger Tears of […]