It is said a journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single step. When I started this journey on June 24, 2015, I had no idea where or how far it would take me. One day seemed like too many to live without Shayna. 1,000 was unthinkable. When people even mentioned a month into the future, I would drop my head. “I can’t even think about that.” I would say.
Yet, here I am, sitting in my office, 1,000 days later. What has transpired in those 1,000 days? What’s the same? What’s different?
Kayla is back in school. She went right back at the end of that summer, just a few weeks after Shayna’s passing. She’s completed her sophomore year. Possibly inspired by Shayna, she changed majors from biology for pre-med to psychology with a minor in Spanish with the goal of working with children. She’s been to Spain. This is the year, when she was 21 and Shayna is 18 that she wanted to take Shayna to New York. In spite of having her dreams of a life with her sister shattered, Kayla is thriving as she finishes up her fourth year of college. I could not be more proud of her.
Tywana and I continue to work on the business. It’s still a struggle, but we keep at it. She has taken a part time job, 12 hours a week to get her out of the house. The house is way too quiet and with no girls to run to basketball, girl scouts, swim team, volleyball, violin, etc. we need to find reasons to get out. Tywana has become a meditator, has changed her reading habits, has become a student of life and the afterlife. I’ve seen strength, wisdom, and patience blossom in her.
We’ve met incredible people in the last 1,000 days. I have met hundreds of people I would not otherwise have met. Some I’ve known only a year, like Tracy and Beth, but it seems like I’ve known them forever. We joined Helping Parents Heal, started and mothballed a local group, then started an online Facebook group that has grown to 2,800 members in well less than a year. Tywana and I co-lead the group along with Tracy and Beth. We have had nationally sought after speakers address our group (and have more in the pipeline). I have met celebrities in this field I would never have met otherwise. I have led an online course. We host meetings several times a month serving parents whose children have transitioned. I’m on staff on the SoulPhone, a project to bring electronic communication across the veil. I’m working on two other projects that aren’t public yet. One will be announced in a few weeks and will have the mission of changing people’s perception about the world we live in. Two of these ventures are volunteer positions. The other, we hope, will generate revenue and give me the opportunity to work in the field I really would like to work in.
1,000 days later we know that Shayna is still with us and that we will see her again once we make our transition. We’ve had incredible signs from her, synchronicities, medium readings, etc. We have immersed ourselves in this new paradigm reading, listening to podcasts, attending conferences, etc. We have been to two afterlife conferences with the first annual Helping Parents Heal conference on the calendar for just a few short weeks from now.
I don’t know that I can say I’ve healed in the last 1,000 days. I can say I’ve grown. I don’t know if the pain has lessened, but the capacity to handle the pain has increased. And, when I don’t think I can make another year or month or day, I remember that I thought the same thing on June 25, 2015 when I opened my eyes to this new world and the beginning of this new journey.
Will it be another 1,000 days? Will it be 10,000 days? I am not in a position to say. What I do know is it won’t be forever. That brings me peace. I also know that what once seemed to be impossible has now been accomplished. 1,000 days.