Day 74- Renewing Of Your Mind

Kayla has been home for Labor Day weekend which has been really, really nice. Kayla is my kindred spirit. We love Ty and Shayna ,who are very much alike. Kayla is the one who likes the movies I like, the conversations I like, the art I like.  Our movie queue is never empty. This weekend we watched Silence of the Lambs, Contact and The Fountain.  

Mornings are still the worst time of day for me.  I will go a few days and be relatively all right, but then I’ll have a few days where facing another day, even one more, just seems overwhelming. I’ve had a couple of those in a row. When that happens I just have to cry a bit and get out and press on. Ty and Kayla keep me motivated to keep moving forward. For now, that will have to do.

Today, we decide to visit Garden Park Unity Church again.  It’s three weeks in a row for Ty and me. Kayla decides to go with us. The sermon is about how our thoughts return to us in kind and the pastor chooses the verse about being transformed by the renewing of your mind as one of her texts. Ty and I have been talking about this verse a lot lately.  When we are back home and discussing the sermon, Ty wonders if it’s too soon after Shayna’s passing to try to make such a major shift.  Maybe we should just be in grief for now and stop trying to hard to do something that takes so much energy.  And it does take a tremendous amount of energy.  I don’t know about for Ty, but for me, the renewal of my mind isn’t a luxury. It isn’t something I can wait to do later, it’s something I have to do now.  It’s a matter of survival.  The sermon is right on time for me.

Today is Labor Day and Kayla has classes tomorrow. So, we have to take her back. It’s such a great treat having her home. I’m so relieved that coming back here is something she wants to do.  I’ve got six hours in the car coming up and then tonight is the season opener for the Buckeyes.

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