Areas of your life we can examine - emotional & spiritual health
These gray hairs in my beard didn’t come easily. I was depressed and anxious as a child. Toxic religion traumatized me. I was extremely insecure with who I was and my place in the world.
In college, I pursued a degree in Chemical Engineering. After obtaining that degree, I went to work in engineering. After engineering, I went into sales with IBM. After eight years with IBM, I left for companies where I could have more autonomy, finally moving to own my own internet retail company which I have run for seventeen years.
Because of the trauma associated with the toxic religion, I studied everything I could get my hands on about religion and death. For about five years, my wife and I were premarital counselors, helping couples with marriage skills before they got married. Thanatophobia, excessive fear of dying, drove me to dive deep into spirituality and science and where the two intersect. I have studied death and the afterlife extensively for over fifteen years.
The sudden death of my fifteen-year-old daughter in 2015 knocked me for a loop. Because of my studies, I knew that Shayna was still OK, still with us and that I would see her again.
Through a series of synchronous events, I found myself in leadership in Helping Parents Heal, an organization of approximately 12,000 parents whose children have gone on before them into the next dimension. I am the primary leader in Helping Parents Heal Online- at the time of this writing about 4,200 parents. As of March 2019, I also serve on the board of Helping Parents Heal.
A life coach can do a few things for you. You might think “I can just talk to my friend.” Yes, friends are precious. What a life coach can do though is offer you the opportunity to have conversations with someone solely focused on you and your life. A good life coach will help you assess where you are, where you want to be, help you make a plan to get there. And, then, help you work that plan.
Anyone can hang up a shingle and say they’re a life coach. Some might even take a course or two and become certified as a life coach. My belief is to be a good life coach, a successful life coach; one must have two things- some innate ability (including empathy, the ability to analyze problems) and the ability to relate to people and experience. But, no course can teach you what experience can.
From experience comes wisdom. Wisdom is knowledge and knowing how to apply that knowledge. I’m qualified to talk to you about depression and anxiety because I’ve been there. I can speak with you about your career because I’ve built a couple of careers and am working on another transition right now. I can talk to you about grief because I’ve experienced the worst loss possible. Are you struggling with your faith? I’ve been there. I’ve raised two daughters. I know about child rearing because I’ve done it. I’ve been married for nearly thirty years. I know what it takes to make a relationship work.
As your life coach, I will use tools and techniques to help you understand yourself better. Who are you? What do you want out of life? What is stopping you from getting it? How do we overcome those obstacles? These are the questions we will answer together. Then, we will make a plan and work that plan.
Maybe I should, perhaps I shouldn’t. I’m not going to be the best for every person. For us to work together, both have to determine we have a good chance at success.
You should know I take a no-nonsense approach if you’re looking for someone to help you look at your “problems” in a straightforward manner. I’m your guy. If you’re looking for someone to reinforce the notion that someone else or even your circumstances are your problems, I’m not your guy.
I believe you are a powerful being, probably more capable and resilient than you realize. You might need someone to help you recognize that and bring it out of you.
Maybe I should, perhaps I shouldn’t. I’m not going to be the best for every person. For us to work together, both have to determine we have a good chance at success. You should know I take a no-nonsense approach if you’re looking for someone to help you look at your “problems” in a straightforward manner. I’m your guy. If you’re looking for someone to reinforce the notion that someone else or even your circumstances are your problems, I’m not your guy. I believe you are a powerful being, probably more capable and resilient than you realize. You might need someone to help you recognize that and bring it out of you.
We can’t control other people. We can’t control circumstances. I want to focus on what we can control, and that is you. Not even I can control you. Only you can control you. If you work with me, we will identify what it is you want in life, develop a plan to get there, and work that plan, including me holding you accountable for doing your part. As your life coach, what I can provide is a fresh perspective, maybe some advice based on my experience, and accountability. Many times people start doing what they know they should be doing only because they know someone else will be checking in on them.
I won’t promise you riches, or finding your soulmate or even happiness. Anyone who does is lying to you. What I will promise you is I will help you set achievable goals; goals which don’t rely on exterior circumstances. We will work to do the best we can to create favorable conditions, which will likely lead to money and relationships and all the rest. When Jesus said “Seek ye first the Kingdom of heaven and all these things will be added to you.”, what he meant was to change from the inside out. Do the inner work first. The outer circumstances naturally follow. I will help you develop a plan that, if worked, will lead from small successes (short term goals) to larger victories (longer term goals) to your vision for what you want your life to be.
Do I sound like the kind of person you’d like to work with?